Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
