WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
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