I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
