wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
