Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
