I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
