.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
