Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
