and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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