cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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