I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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