Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Randomize
