I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
