it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
That reminds me...we need to get swords
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I wish there were birth control emojis
They took my balls.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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