i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
this will be a night to untag.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
