Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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