Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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