be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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