apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
