hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize