Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
