I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
