weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
