apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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