i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize