He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Sext me about skeletons
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
