well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
