i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize