Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
