She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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