I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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