he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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