She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
