Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
