He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
