So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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