talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize
