Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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