Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
