Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
