you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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