Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize