Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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