im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
