There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
