Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
