I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
