yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
