if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
