is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
